On giving things up and the joys of parenting

Me and my van in better days

Yesterday was a hard day. I decided that I should give up driving.

I made this decision after having a heckuva time getting into and out of the County Building parking lot last week. I had driven my modified van downtown to get a certified copy of my daughter's marriage license, something I didn't think would be too difficult. And it wasn't, except for the driving part.

Oscar and me?

I got in to the parking lot easily enough --  if easily enough means that the attendant came out to give me a ticket rather than me unbuckling my seat belt and grabbing it from the automatic dispenser. But when I attempted to leave the parking lot it was a different story. I had to make a sharp right hand turn which I apparently didn't make quite sharp enough because I ended up scraping the bottom of the van on the curb. The attendant had to leave his booth and steer me through the exit lane. It was a very humbling experience. I arrived home happy that I hadn't hit anyone or damaged the van, but unwilling to take any more risks.

Giving up driving is a big step -- now I know how the elderly father of a friend felt when he came into the garage and his car was gone. He started crying. Giving up driving means relinquishing some independence and draws the circle of your life in just a bit more. Sometimes I think that circle just gets smaller and smaller until you die. Kind of depressing isn't it? Well, read on.

There is a bright side to any situation; but sometimes you have to look harder for it. Yesterday the bright side came in the form of my amazing children. Luckily it was a day off for both of them and the older daughter, after hearing of my plight, drove out and took me to lunch. Boy was that an improvement in my mood -- I went from feeling trapped to feeling loved!

After a long and tasty lunch, she brought me back home and later on I Skyped with my younger daughter who lives up near Chicago.  Skype is one of the best inventions ever! She works with disabled children and was very sympathetic. It was uplifting just to see her.

When your kids are young, you wonder when they will stop needing so much from you. But I never expected that when they grew up they would give back so much. And right when I needed it. The kids are more than all right -- they're a gift.